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And I will be coming by on Monday and Friday evenings to inspect it.

Well, I'll put on a chicken.

And there's always the job issue.

This is the nearest employment office. I took the liberty of making an appointment for you.

- Thank you. - By the way, do you have any special skills?

Oh, yes. I do.

I do voices.

What do you mean, you do voices?

Well, I do voices.

Yes!

We're looking for intelligent life. Oops, mistake!

Happy to be in America. Don't ask for a green card.

I want you in the worst way.

This is certainly a rough meeting. It's not going very well for me.

Hey, boss, give her a chance. She's gonna loosen up any moment.

Look at me, Moneypenny. I want to undo that bow and get to know you.

I'm crazy to make a deal with you!

Nancy and I are still looking for the other half of my head.

They're doin' it! I'm sittin' on a gold mine!

Don't make me smack you, sweetheart.

I do a great impression of a hot dog.

Mr Hillard, do you consider yourself humorous?

I used to.

There was a time when I found myself funny.

But today you have proven me wrong. Thank you.

Listen, bottom line...

I need to be with my children, and I'll do anything to do that.

You just tell me what to do.

- Excuse me. You Tony? - That's me.

Hi. I'm Daniel Hillard, the actor.

Follow me.

Oh, films! Will I be introducing these movies on air?

- Not exactly. - What do I do?

You take all these cans. You box 'em and you ship 'em.

Then you box those cans over there. Ship them. Then more will come in.

You box those, you ship those.

Any questions?

After you box 'em...?

You ship 'em.

Lots of luck, smartass.

I think I made a friend.

- Miranda. - Stu!

Hello, Miranda.

- It's been a long time. - Yes.

Mr Dunmeyer's come by to look over your sketches.

Let me show you to the conference room.

As you probably know, the estate was built in 1876.

These sketches are meant to reflect your desire to have it completely restored.

You look better than ever.

The lobby will resemble a music salon with inspiration from the French Second Empire.

I was thinking a 17th-century grand piano...

I've been following your career these past couple of years.

A tufted sofa, a Flemish tapestry, a brass-bound Regency-style table...

I'd love to get reacquainted. Catch up.

Mantel clocks.

Fringed, upholstered chairs, heavy drapes.

Can we talk? Over dinner, maybe?

Stuart, thank you. I...

I'm at the beginning of a divorce.

It just didn't work out.

- Oh, Miranda, I'm sorry. - You don't have to say that.

No, really. I mean, I never held any grudges or anything. I just...

Well, I always hoped you'd find happiness.

Oh, God, that's so nice.

I was just worried my coming in here might scare you off the project.

No, no. Of course not. I...

I'm a professional. I'm...

I was flattered that you thought of me after all these years and everything.

Yeah, everything.

Well... Ancient history.

Yeah.

I'm late. I've got a meeting over at the bank.

Can we talk maybe later in the week?

- Sure. - Good.

It's good to see you again.

Good, huh?

I know the place doesn't look like much now, but...

It'll be OK. How do you like it?

- Nice. - It's OK.

Detestable.

Hey, just give me some time.

I'm not too comfortable with this new lifestyle.

Neither are we.

I know it's hard, sweetie.

Can't you just tell Mom you're sorry?

Wish I could.

You know, grown-up problems...

They're a little more complicated, Nattie.

How is the old battle-axe?

- Your mom. - She's fine.

Oh. I'm glad to hear that.

I'd hate to think that she came down with amoebic dysentery or piles.

What's amoebic dysentery?

It's an infection in your tummy where you get diarrhoea for ever.

- Diarrhoea for ever? - And your body dries up and you die.

- You die? - You don't have to be so graphic with her.

- I read about it in a science book. - Why would you want Mommy to die?

Oh, honey, I don't want Mommy to die.

Then why did you say that?

Look, Dad, you're not trying very hard.

We only get to come here once a week. That's not very much.

You're right. I'm sorry. I'll try harder.

Nattie, I'll think good thoughts, OK?

- About Mommy? - I'll try. I really will.

- And call her a princess. - Oh, yes.

And right now I feel like a toad.

Daddy's a toad.

- That's Mom. - Can't be. She's an hour early.

Come on, Nattie, we gotta go.

No, no! Come on, sit down.

Sit down!

You don't have to run off when she honks the horn.

Come on, you're on my time now.

You're my goddamn kids, too!

Come on.

Hi.

Oh, Daniel... Charming.

Thank you, Miranda. I was going for a refugee motif.

Fleeing-my-homeland kind of thing.

But look at you!

This lovely Dances With Wolves motif. What's your Indian name: Shops With A Fist?

- Are my children ready yet? - No, our children are not ready yet...

...because you are an hour early and you were late dropping them off.

Daniel, I don't have time for this. I have to drop something off at the newspaper office.

Newspaper? Are you taking out one of those personal ads?

"DWF seeks WWM with BMW, into light B&D"?

I'm placing an ad for a housekeeper.

Housekeeper? Why do you need a housekeeper?

I need someone to be there when the children get home from school, to clean, start dinner...

- How much are you gonna pay? - $300 a week. Is that all right?

May I see the ad?

- I have a right as their father. Please? - All right. Anything else you wanna see?

- Are you offering? - Not any more.

What's the change?

- Are you guys all right? - Yeah, Mommy. We're fine.

Miranda, why not let me take care of the kids?

I'll pick 'em up after school, be with them, then drop them off at your house after work.

- That'd be great! - Please!

- Look. The kids love it. - Mommy, please!

I'll think about it.

We're his goddamn kids, too.

Kids say the darndest things.

Thank you. Any other choice phrases you'd like to teach our five-year-old, Daniel?

Come on, everybody get their coats.

- Put them on and let's get out of here. - OK, Mom.

I would say go to the bathroom before we go, but I don't think that's a good idea.

Don't forget anything. I don't wanna come back.

Come on, let's go.

- See you Saturday. - Say goodbye to your father.

Goodbye, Daddy.

- Here's your ad. - I'll get my purse.

Yeah, you'd better.

Hello. Are you calling in response to the ad?

- Who was your previous employer? - I was in a band. Severe Tyre Damage.

- In a band? - I just wanna know one thing.

Are your kids well-behaved, or do they need, like, a few light slams every now and then?

- I'll have to get back to you. - Wow!

Ja, my name is llsa Himmelman. I want to know how many children do you have?

- I have two girls and a boy. - Oh, a boy!

I don't work with the males cos I used to be one.

Yikes.

Hello.

Leyla, get back in your cell! Don't make me get the hose!

Hello?

I am job.

- Do you speak English? - I am job.

I'm sorry. The position has been filled.

Oh, what a nightmare!

Let's go in for the kill.

Hello?

I'm calling in regards to the ad I read in the paper.

Yes. Well, would you tell me a little bit about yourself?

Oh, certainly, dear.

For the past 15 years I've worked for the Smythe family of Elbourne, England.

That's Smythe, not Smith, dear.

And for them, I did housecleaning, cooking, and took care of their four glorious children.

I grew quite attached to them after 15 years, but they grew up, as children tend to.

Oh, but listen to me. I am going on when you should be telling me about your little ones.

- Well, I have two girls... - Oh, two precious gems.